Millions of parents struggling with mental health issues, self-blame and stress
Millions of parents are struggling with mental health issues, stress, anxiety and relationship problems and are seeking counselling for themselves, as a result of caring for a child with poor mental health, according to a new report released ahead of World Mental Health Day on 10th October.
In the UK, around 2.5 million children have a mental health issue. In the first research of its kind, the charity Parenting Mental Health has carried out an in-depth study, questioning parents who are supporting a child with poor mental health to find out how it impacts their own health, wellbeing and day-to-day life.
Two-fifths of parents are seeking support or counselling for themselves, to help them cope with the challenges related to their child’s mental health, according to the research. The overwhelming majority (94%) of parents said that they experienced ‘a great deal’ or ‘a lot’ of stress and anxiety due to their child’s mental health challenges, while the remaining 6% had experienced ‘a moderate amount’ or ‘a little’. Not a single parent said they hadn’t experienced stress or anxiety.
The majority (91%) of parents said they have experienced feelings of guilt or self-blame in relation to their child’s mental health struggles.
Most parents noticed physical health changes in themselves that they attribute to this stress. Over half (54%) said they’d noticed ‘a great deal’ or ‘a lot’ of physical health changes, while 42% reported ‘a moderate amount’ or ‘a little’ change. Only 5% said they hadn’t experienced any physical health changes.
Most parents say that they feel their child’s mental health has impacted their sleep quality too. Nearly three-quarters (72%) noticed it had affected their sleep ‘a great deal’ or ‘a lot’, while a quarter (26%) said it had affected their sleep ‘a moderate amount’ or ‘a little’, with just 2% stating that it hadn’t impacted their sleep.
Founder of Parenting Mental Health
Suzanne Alderson, Founder of Parenting Mental Health, said: “Being a parent can be tough at the best of times. When you factor in the worries around caring for a child with poor mental health, it can feel impossible. Parents tell us they just don’t have the time or the energy for their own self-care or things like socialising, exercising, eating healthily or having proper sleep. If parents’ own physical and mental health deteriorates, they can’t give their best to helping their children.
“That’s why I set up Parenting Mental Health; to give families the support, skills and resources to help them through these difficult times. Having gone through all of this myself, I never want parents in the same situation to feel as alone and helpless as I once did. I would urge anyone who is struggling tojoin our Facebook community, which is filled with practical advice and stories from parents in a similar position ”
Suzanne founded Parenting Mental Health after experiencing the severe lack of practical and emotional support available for parents when her 14-year-old daughter was bullied, became depressed, and attempted suicide. The charity aims to support and skill 1 million parents through their child’s mental health issues by 2026.
What began as a Facebook group in 2016 has grown into a community of over 40,000 parents worldwide. Parenting Mental Health provides resources, such as books and courses, to help parents navigate this extraordinary and often unsupported and misunderstood experience. The charity emphasises the importance of parents prioritising their own mental and physical health and wellbeing as part of their caregiving role. And its community groups and services connect parents with others who understand their journey, helping to reduce the isolation and stigma that so many face.
The findings of the report are presented in the report – Parenting a child with poor mental health: A study of lived experiences Parentingmentalhealth.org/report-2024
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