The first day of school is one of the biggest days in a child’s, and their parents’ lives. The settling in days have been done, the summer break has been enjoyed, and crunch time is here. However, more and more reception teachers are seeing that children aren’t ready to master the basic tasks they need to do on their first day at school.
Georgie Hunter, Head of Pre-Prep and EYFS at Highfield and Brookham School says: “Over the last few years we’ve witnessed a shift in the readiness for school. Not in their enthusiasm, that spark is as bright as ever, but in the small, practical, everyday things that make school life work.
“This is not a criticism of parents, not even close. Modern family life is hard; parents are time-poor, schedules are relentless and the juggle between work and home is very real. But the cumulative effect of those small, well-intentioned shortcuts is showing up in our classrooms. Every minute a teacher spends helping a child do the day-to-day tasks they should have mastered, like getting changed, doing buttons, putting their shoes on etc, means less time being taught important lessons in the classroom.
“And children want to feel empowered; they enjoy the responsibility of carrying their bags, the pride of getting changed independently and helping Mum or Dad; these small acts build a sense of self-reliance that follows them right into the classroom.”
As August hits, it’s a mere few weeks until 2021 – 2022 babies embark on their first day of school, so Georgie Hunter from Highfield and Brookham School shares her top tips on preparing your four-year-old for their first day:
- Independent dressing every day. Let them do it themselves: buttons, zips, shoes. Time it like a game. Celebrate the wins and share the struggles together. Build this into the morning routine now so it is established well before September.
- Give them things to carry. Their bag to the car, washing to the basket, toys back to their room. Assign one small responsibility per day. Children who feel trusted feel capable, and capable children thrive at school.
- Make screen time purposeful. Watch together, talk about what you have seen, and use it as a jumping-off point for an activity. If your child watches a programme about animals, visit a farm or draw pictures afterwards. Quality and conversation matter far more than quantity.
- Choose your language with care. Drop “big school” in favour of “your school” or “new school.” Visit the library and pick up a few books with positive school stories. Let your child see you excited, your feelings are contagious.
- Establish family rules and keep them. Decide on a few clear, reasonable expectations around bedtime, mealtimes, manners, and screen use. Children who understand that rules apply to everyone feel safer and settle into school expectations far more quickly. Find out your school’s rules before September. Long hair tied back? Get ahead of any practicalities now so there are no surprises on the first day.
- Practise taking turns. Play turn–taking games such as rolling a ball or a simple board game. Model sharing language, “can I have a turn?” This will help develop their listening skills as well as their ability to share.
- Read together every single day. Bedtime stories are one of the greatest gifts you can give a child. Turning pages, following a storyline, learning that reading is something you do together and for pleasure: this is the bedrock of literacy. It also builds vocabulary in a way no screen can match.
- Practise separation gently. Short stretches with grandparents, a trusted friend, or a playdate without you helps children become comfortable with the idea that you go and you always come back. This single piece of knowledge makes the school drop-off so much easier.
- Create a scrapbook of their world. Gather photos of the people, places, and things that matter most to them over the summer. This becomes a wonderful conversation starter with their new teacher and classmates, a little piece of home that helps them feel known from day one.
- Help them learn to recognise their name. It will be on their peg, their table, their books, and their tray. Start with the first letter, then build from there. And make sure all their labels say exactly the name they will be known by at school: if they are Freddie, don’t label everything Frederick.
In conclusion, Georgie says: “Starting school is not a leap off a cliff. It is a gentle slope that you walk together, over many months. The families who arrive in September having worked on some of these small things over the summer always find the transition smoother, not because their children are perfect, but because they feel ready. And the drop-off, when it comes? Keep it warm, keep it brief, and walk away smiling. You have prepared them well. They are more ready than you know!”
Highfield and Brookham is an independent school for children aged two to 13, set just outside Liphook in the South Downs National Park on the borders of Hampshire, Surrey and West Sussex. It was shortlisted for the Independent Prep School of the Year 2026 by Tes Awards and was commended in the Independent Schools of the Year Awards 2026 for Student Wellbeing.
